Pairings/Characters: Jared/Jensen, Past Jared/OMC, Misha Collins
Word Count: 5,589
Warnings: mpreg, mentions of past abuse
A/N: This is a timestamp/sequel, whatever you want to call it to my fic The Season of Change. You do not have to read that to understand this, but it's highly recommended you do so. I want to thank Brittany for working so fast to get this beta'd. I know there was A LOT of mistakes I made when I was writing so fast, and especially since this is finals week she is a life saver!
Summary: Jared and Jensen are trying to prepare for the birth of their child. But Jared is dealing with memories of his past relationship. He begins to learn that sometimes you have to let things go to really begin to heal.
“I can’t believe you Jared!” Mike yelled angrily, his fists waving in the air making Jared flinch.
“I-I’m so-sorry.” Jared stuttered, curling his hands in his oversized sweatshirt, trying to take some comfort in the warm fabric. Mike was really angry this time and all because Jared accidently got a bleach stain on Mike’s dress shirt. It wasn’t like the guy didn’t own a closet full of shirts that were identical or that he didn’t have enough money to buy a new one.
“Sorry isn’t good enough Jared! Now do something to fix this or I swear to god I’ll come home and show you something you’ll definitely regret.”
The black shirt was flung at Jared’s face as before Mike stormed out of their shared apartment, slamming the door behind him.
“Baby?” Jared flinched and focused on his boyfriend who was trying to get his attention.
“You okay? Need a refill?” Jared looked down at his cold, untouched hot chocolate and took a deep breath, trying to dispel Mike and all thoughts of him. “Actually can I maybe get some tea?”
Jensen smirked. “Sure thing, are you sure you’re okay though? You looked kind of lost in thought.”
Jared felt his eyes water a little. It was still weird at hearing someone so concerned for him. After years of Mike’s emotional abuse it always felt odd when someone showed genuine interest and care for him. Though it was something Jared had to get used to seeing as how the baby was going to be born soon and Jensen treated him just like he was his own.
“I was just thinking about a new project.” Jared lied hoping Jensen would believe it.
“Oh okay.” Jensen’s tone didn’t sound as if he believed Jared’s lie but thankfully he let it slide for the moment. “I’ll be back with some tea for you. I should be getting off anytime now so we can head on home.”
“I love you.” Jared whispered, a small smile curling at his lips.
Jensen smiled in return, bending over the counter much to Misha’s amusement and kissing Jared softly on the lips. “I love you too.”
“Okay okay enough with the kissy face! I might actually barf.” Misha fake gagged, making Jensen smack him with his dishtowel. The act caused Jared to giggle and settle down, Mike finally slipping from his mind.
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
Jared grumbled, rubbing his face against his pillow. “Jens, I’m trying to sleep,-” Jared whined.
“I’m sorry…” Jensen’s hands pressed against his back lightly, almost afraid of making contact. “I’m just worried about you is all.”
Jared shivered when Jensen’s warm lips made contact with his shoulder blade.
“I’m okay I promise.” Jared smiled as he turned over in bed. The moon was shining in through their curtain, casting an eerie glow around the room. Jensen’s spiked hair was matted down on one side; he looked downright adorable like that. But Jensen’s eyes spoke of a deeper worry.
“You’re too good to me you know?” Jared murmured softly, cupping his boyfriends face and sliding his thumb across his full lips.
“You deserve all the care in the world. It’s just with my brother…” Jensen trailed off but Jared got the picture.
When they were just getting to know each other Jared accidently found pictures of Jensen’s dead brother and pried a little too hard resulting in a fight.
Let’s just say Jared was as close to being scared as he has ever been around Jensen. Not scared for himself but scared for Jensen who got worked up to the point that Jared thought he might explode.
After they had both calmed down Jensen had finally sat down and explained that his brother was in an abusive relationship and was acting morose and lost in thought a week before he took his own life. Jared could see the obvious parallels between him and Jensen’s brother, and he had hated that he was a constant reminder of that pain. Yet he hated how his current actions these past few weeks had been causing his boyfriend pain all the more.
“Aw baby c’mere.” Jared crooned softly, beckoning Jensen into his arms despite his belly bump preventing them from truly hugging.
Jensen sighed as he snuggled into the crook of Jared’s neck. “I just want you to be okay.”
“I know you do. I’m sorry I scared you but I’m okay we’ll talk more about what’s been bothering me tomorrow okay? Get some sleep you’ve been working way too hard and have been exhausted these past few days. I’m worried about you too you know.”
When Jared didn’t get a response he frowned. “Jensen?”
A soft snore answered him back making Jared smile fondly. “Goodnight.”
The next morning proved to be anything but peaceful. As promised Jensen awoke bright and early ready for their ‘talk’. Jared on the other hand was crabby in the mornings, even more so since becoming pregnant, so seeing his boyfriend all cheerful and alert was making Jared hiss like a serpent.
“You know you’re cute when you’re crabby.”
Jared groaned and glared at his amused boyfriend. “Well you’re mean.”
“Mean? Jay I can’t believe you. That hurts me a lot.” Jensen clutched his heart dramatically making Jared finally smile at his boyfriend’s perkiness. He wasn’t lying when he said he was worried about Jensen. The man worked insane hours on top of trying to take care of a pregnant boyfriend. He was downright exhausted and needed the rest. Jared was just glad it seemed like he got reenergized again.
“I was thinking maybe we could go to the beach or something.”
“The beach!? Jensen are you out of your mind? I’m not going out in public looking like a cow!”
Jensen didn’t seem fazed at the hysterical outburst, likely already used to them due to how frequent they have been popping up.
“First off, you’re not a cow; you’re carrying a child. Second, it doesn’t matter if you’re pregnant. You’ll still be the hottest guy on the beach and third it’s a beautiful day out and you said we’d talk.”
Damn Jared thought internally. He knew that would bite him in the ass. Seeing Jensen’s slightly hopeful look had Jared faltering. He knew Jensen just wanted to have a relaxing day out, and how could he not indulge him?
“Fine, fine! I’ll get ready but if I drown I’m haunting your ass.”
“Duly noted.” Jensen smirked, making Jared grumble as he waddled to their room to find something decent to wear and that actually fit.
About twenty minutes and a torn up closet later, Jared finally emerged from their room wearing basketball shorts since his bathing suit didn’t fit anymore and a stretched out t-shirt. He looked like absolute shit. There was no denying it. He was big and awkward. He could only imagine the stares and snickers he would get when they went out in public.
Why did he ever agree to this again? Oh yeah because being pregnant makes him ten times more susceptible to his boyfriend’s pouting lips. Wonderful.
“You look great baby!”
Jared snorted. “No you look great. I look like a cow.”
“Quit being so pessimistic.” Jensen walked over and smoothed down Jared’s errant strands of hair, making Jared smile.
Jensen was of course drop dead gorgeous in his skin tight black swimsuit and a plain white shirt that showed his nipples off.
Jensen better pray that when he goes in the water and his shirt becomes see through that Jared doesn’t pop a boner on sight.
Jared might strangle him.
“Are you ready?”
“As I’ll ever be I guess.” Seeing Jensen glare again had Jared laughing. Maybe this day wouldn’t be so bad after all.
Scratch what he said earlier. This day was shaping up to be spectacularly crappy.
After they got caught in traffic for over an hour, they finally made it to their destination. Of course, since they didn’t make it early almost all of the parking spaces were taken up.
Which forced Jared to walk all the way to the beach in the 80-degree weather.
After they finally got settled under an umbrella Jared was panting like a 90-year-old chain smoker. It reminded him that he did indeed have asthma, even though it hasn’t bothered him for years. Nevertheless, it forced Jared to tell Jensen another aspect of himself he has been hiding.
In turn, that caused a shouting match, with Jensen hovering over him almost ready to dial 911 and Jared finally yelling at him to go swim or something.
All in all this day didn’t turn out as planned.
Jared stayed under the umbrella as he watched Jensen dip under the water again. He couldn’t make it out to the water if he tried, and with all the people mingling about Jared wasn’t too sure he wanted to.
A memory began to wade to the surface of his mind, causing Jared close his eyes.
”Come on baby I was only kidding.”
Jared breathed deeply, still coughing up water as he tried to regulate his breathing. Mike’s idea of kidding was to shove Jared’s head under the water until he felt his lungs would explode. Finally, when Mike’s strong arm let him up he was coughing and choking forcing Mike to practically carry him back to shore.
Luckily, no one else was on the beach seeing as how it was night. Mike said it’d be romantic and Jared really wanted that to be true. Lately Mike has been acting different, yelling and screaming to the point where Jared is afraid to even converse with the guy.
Now, even after Jared told Mike he had asthma, the man seemed like he wanted to kill him.
It made Jared shake for reasons unrelated to the cold water.
“Don’t give me that face Jared. You just don’t know when to have fun. I swear you always manage to make something romantic or something entertaining and turn it sour.”
With that Mike walked away in a huff, leaving Jared kneeling in the dirt praying he’d be able to catch his breath and that Mike wouldn’t be too angry when they got home.
Jared jumped out of his memory, blinking open his eyes to stare at his wet boyfriend leaning over him.
“Hey, you okay? Are you too hot?”
Jared breathed deeply, still remembering that night. He began to feel the overwhelming terror begin; it was almost like remembering that night was causing another asthma attack.
“Jensen we need to talk.”
Jensen’s eyes furrowed in concern. “Is it the baby? Is she coming? God Jay why didn’t you tell me! This is all my fault I have to call Misha and-”
“Jensen!” Jared yelled, breaking his boyfriend out of his panic. “Calm down, It’s not the baby. We need to have the ‘talk’.”
Jensen breathed a sigh of relief as he plopped down next to Jared on the towel. Jensen was still wet from his swim, which was causing water to drop onto Jared.
“Okay so let’s talk.”
Jared wasn’t sure what to say. How could he begin to describe the feeling of helplessness and terror that came to mind every time he thought of Mike? Hell how could he explain to his boyfriend that he’d even been thinking of about his ex?
“You know about my past relationship.”
Jensen nodded. “Of course I do. I-is that what’s bothering you?”
“Yeah,” Jared breathed shakily. “I don’t know what’s wrong I just keep thinking of him. Remembering things we did together or things he did to me and its making me anxious and I don’t know how to even begin to describe to you how afraid he made me feel. He didn’t even have to hit me; his voice was enough to have me shaking.” Jared rambled, wanting to get out everything he was feeling.
“You’re right I can’t ever understand that feeling. I’m here to listen though, and offer comfort and support when you need it.
Because I love you and I love this baby and that will never change. I can’t say I will never get angry at you for something because I’m sure I will at some point. However, you don’t know how badly I want to find this Mike and beat the holy hell out of him. But you and your needs come first okay? You can always talk to me, you know that?”
“I know.” Jared whispered, feeling tears pool in his eyes. He can’t ever guarantee the hold Mike has on him will go away but he’s trying to let it go.
“Good.” Jensen smiled. “Maybe you should come in the water with me? You’ve been sitting here for so long, and I don’t want you to get overheated.”
“Have you not realized if I go in the water I will sink?” Jared replied matter of factly.
“Not when you have me.”
Those five simple words that weren’t even meant to be sappy, yet they made Jared’s heart swell and his stomach do a little flip that had nothing to do with the baby.
“Do I even need to answer that?”
Jared smiled and shook his head. “Nah, I just like to keep you on your toes.” Jared winked making Jensen smile as he helped him up to a standing position. Jared wobbled for a moment thanks to a head rush, but feeling his boyfriends strong arms supporting him gave Jared the strength and confidence to ignore the rest of the beach goers and focus on having fun.
“You didn’t tell me the water was so cold!” Jared about screamed like a girl when he dipped his toes in the icy water.
“Come on Jared, it’ll cool you off.” Jensen slowly but surely got Jared to walk into the water. When the sand below began to get deeper to the point Jared couldn’t stand he felt Jensen’s hold increase until they were both floating in the water.
“This does feel nice,” Jared murmured, enjoying the feeling of weightlessness.
“I told you so! See, I’m always right.”
Jared snorted but closed his eyes. He felt a slight twinge of pain in his abdomen that made him scrunch his face in annoyance.
“I don’t think she likes the cold very much.” Jared stated seriously, breathing through his nose until the pain lessened.
“Alright let’s get you out of the water then. We can get toweled off and head home. I’d say this trip was a success.”
Jensen slowly began to help him out of the water. By now most of the beach goers were packing and getting ready to leave since it was closing in on five.
Jared felt guilty for making Jensen do all the packing and lifting but the pain was afresh in his stomach again and he couldn’t bear to bend over at the moment. It wasn’t like Jensen even asked for his help, though it doesn’t lessen his guilt seeing how tired Jensen was after helping him to the car.
“Ready to head home princess?”
Jared ignored the jab and leaned over as much as he could and kissed his boyfriend. “Thank you, for everything today.”
Jensen smiled against his lips before repeating the gesture. “No thanks needed.”
Lightning cracked outside their window, waking Jared from his sound sleep.
His eyes blinked open fuzzily as he stared at their alarm clock, trying to get the time. The red numbers flashed 12:00, telling Jared the power must have went out for a brief moment sometime after they had fallen asleep. Groaning, Jared managed to push himself up to a sitting position. His baby protested the movement with a sharp kick to Jared’s bladder.
Wiping the sleep from his eyes, he began to stumble to the bathroom knocking into things on the way there. It was a miracle that Jensen still stayed soundly asleep, snoring softly.
Flicking on the light Jared managed to quickly use the bathroom before he fell over.
Stumbling back to their bedroom with sleep in mind he sat down on the bed and grimaced.
The bed was wet.
Ugh gross Jared thought. He must have used the bathroom on accident sometime during the night. Disgusted with himself and his bladder, Jared felt like crying.
He was overly emotional, tired, and in serious need of some candy right about now. It was raining, wet, the lighting and thunder competing with one another to see who could annoy Jared faster and it looked like he had peed the bed like a five year old.
“Jay?” Jensen mumbled sleepily, blindly flinging his hand out to search for him. “You kay’?”
Jared wanted to scream that no he was not okay but at that moment his baby decided to make an appearance again. A sharp pain ate up his stomach, making him gasp and curl inwards.
“Jared?” Jensen was fully awake now and sitting up in bed, peering at him with concern.
Jared tried to massage away the cramp but his stomach was hard and rippling. His mind connected the dots quickly. I didn’t pee the bed my water broke! Jared groaned until the pain eased up and his stomach softened again.
“Jared? Answer me you’re scaring me here.” Jensen’s voice had a worried shake to it that made Jared feel guilty. “Is it the baby?”
Jared breathed out through his nose, too scared to begin to talk. Though when he heard Jensen gasp as his hand connected with the wet spot he knew his boyfriend figured it out on his own.
“Shit we have to get you to a hospital!” After that Jensen was up and rushing around the room. Things began flying as he got their bag that was, thankfully, packed earlier in the week just for this moment.
Jared did his best to breathe through the pain every time a contraction hit but it was getting harder. They were coming in such high frequencies it actually made Jared scared.
What was he supposed to do? Was he ready for this? Was Jensen ready?
“Knowing you you’ll likely drop the kid on its head or something.” Mike laughed as he took another swig of his beer.
Jared smiled but his heart was beating ninety miles an hour in his chest. He didn’t know how their conversation wandered over into having children, but he wished he would have kept his mouth shut because hearing this was entirely too painful.
Mike knew Jared wanted children someday, and here he was telling Jared he would be a horrible father. It wasn’t like Jared was already terrified of that happening.
“Besides what do you need a kid for, you’re still a kid yourself. Always needing someone to take care of you, good thing you have me.” Mike leered at Jared, in a not so subtle way making him cringe. But he accepted Mike’s kiss willingly and tried to forget this whole conversation.
Jared flinched and focused on Jensen who was hovering above him, his face creased with worry and his eyes belying the urgency he felt. “Are you ready? Do you maybe want to get changed?”
Jared grimaced at being reminded of his wet sweatpants but shook his head. He didn’t have the energy or the time.
“Okay then, well let’s get you to the car.” With Jensen’s help Jared managed to stand up. His stomach protested the position, causing him to groan. But feeling Jensen’s grip tighten gave him the strength to begin walking to the car. The thunder crashed loudly again making the whole house shake from the force.
Jared forgot it was raining.
“Yeah the rain is going to be a problem. I already got the bag in the car.”
Jared didn’t even know he said that out loud. Opening the door, the wind blew in making Jared shiver. His hair was blowing across his face, getting in his eyes and preventing him from seeing. Luckily, their house had a carport to prevent them from getting completely soaked. The wind was whipping the rain in their faces but they weren’t getting as drenched as they could have.
Everything else seemed to happen in a blurry frenzy.
Although one thing never changed: Jensen’s presences. He was by his side for every second.
“You’re gonna be fine baby, yeah? We’ll get to meet em’ real soon and we’ll be up all night hanging diapers just like we groaned about earlier.”
Jensen’s rambling was calming Jared down until he was able to drown out the storm and ride out the pain until they got to the hospital.
Jared groaned and tried to open his heavy eyelids. Voices kept floating in and out and the lights seemed to burn into his retinas.
When he finally opened his crusty eyes, he flinched. He heard someone cursing before the lights were blessedly turned down.
“Jen…?” Jared’s throat was scratchy and irritated. He remembered his water breaking and Jensen taking him to the hospital but nothing else. Habitually he felt for his swollen belly and sighed in relief as feeling it still as rounded as it was.
“Baby?” Jared rasped out.
“You’ve been sedated, there have been some complications.” Jared watched as Jensen took a while to swallow his words before continuing. “But the doctors say you and the baby will be just fine. They need to perform an emergency c-section.”
Jared let the words wash over him and tried to keep the panic and terror out of his eyes. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. He was supposed to deliver like every normal person and cry as his baby was finally nestled in his arms, with Jensen leaning over him with equal joy in his expression.
He felt like he was spiraling, all of Mike’s words coming back to him and taking hold.
“You’ll be fine, okay baby? I’ll wait right here for you and our little one, okay? I love you.”
Jared furrowed his brow, panic beginning to wash over him causing the monitors to go haywire. “Why aren’t you coming with me?!”
“Jared you need to calm down.”
Jared grasped Jensen’s hand tightly, not preparing to let go anytime soon. “No! Yo-you promised me! I can’t do this by myself I need you.” Jared sobbed.
“There is no time.” Jensen’s voice took on a serious tone making Jared stop his theatrics to finally look at his boyfriend. Jensen as crying as well, a sight that Jared rarely saw and his hand was shaking where Jared had it in a death grip. “It’s too much of a risk and they need to take you now do you understand?”
“We can’t wait anymore Mr. Ackles we need to start prepping and get Jared down to the OR.”
Jensen flinched, something else that Jared rarely saw, and tried to compose himself by taking a deep breath.
“Okay, just one more minute please?”
The doctor didn’t look happy but nodded.
“Listen your vitals are erratic and they need to get the baby out right away. I wish I could stay in there with you god I do but there is no time. You’ll be fine okay? You’re strong and I believe in you. I’ll be waiting with Misha and be the first thing you see when you wake up. I love you, okay?” Jensen bent down and gave Jared’s chapped lips a long, slow kiss, savoring the moment just in case.
“I love you too.” Jared responded before he felt fluids being pumped through his veins. He looked to his left and saw a nurse inserting something into his IV port. He felt his muscles begin to loosen and his heart begin to beat at a more normal pace. He stared at Jensen’s teary eyed smile one last time before he felt himself slipping away.
“How long are we looking at here?”
The doctor adjusted his glasses before he answered, “Barring any more complications I would determine an hour or more.”
“More complications?” Jensen muttered, his worry beginning to overcome him.
“Mr. Ackles we discussed this already. I hate sounding insensitive but we really need to get the baby out. Jared’s vitals are becoming a bit unstable and as he does, so will the baby. I assure you we will all do our absolute best to deliver this baby without any problems. This staff is trained for situations just as this; please try not to worry too much.”
Jensen smiled. “Easier said than done.”
“I know how that goes.” The doctor jibbed back well naturedly. “We have a private waiting room that our nurse will escort you in; when the c-section is over I’ll come out personally to tell you.”
“Thanks doctor,” Jensen muttered gratefully. He liked the man’s directness much better than other doctors who try to bullshit you.
The doctor smiled in response and Jensen watched as his whole world was wheeled out of the room and into doors that Jensen couldn’t follow.
That was killing him the most, he promised Jared whatever happened he would always follow and be by his side.
Like that guy was much help.
Jensen shook his head of the thoughts and tried to focus. Jared didn’t need his mind wandering off. The only comfort Jensen had was in knowing Misha would be there shortly. His Mom and step-dad lived in Dallas so it’ll be a little while before they could make it out to LA.
“Excuse me, Mr. Ackles?”
Jensen lifted his head to look at one of the nurses from the front desk. “Yes?”
“I have someone waiting at the front desk for Jared, would you like me to send them back?”
Thinking that it was Misha, Jensen nodded. “Yes please.”
“Great they’ll be right back.”
The nurse walked away briskly and through a door. Jensen couldn’t wait until his friend’s logic could wash over him and calm him down. Misha always had that effect on him.
What came through the door was not Misha though.
He wasn’t even sure who the hell this guy was. Jensen felt his hackles rise as the guy’s biker boots squeaked across the linoleum.
“Jensen is it?”
The guy smiled and Jensen suddenly flashed back to the first day he saw Jared.
It was Mike.
“What the fuck?” Jensen stood up, his muscles coiling until he felt like he was ready to explode. “Who the fuck let you in here?!”
“That would be you actually, and I have every right to be here. I’m the baby’s father of course. What did you tell all the doctors and nurses that you were the father? Sounds like a pipe dream to me. You might as well take your pretty ass down the road because as soon as Jar-”
Before Mike can even get another word out Jensen’s fist was flying to connect with his face.
Two of Jensen’s fingers dislocated on impact and Mike’s frame faltered, almost tumbling over. However, Mike was bigger than Jensen both in size and strength, so Jensen knew, logically, that one punch wouldn’t end all of this. He knew that hitting him one time wouldn’t even erase how much Jensen hated the man, for all he had done to Jared.
It wasn’t until he had an ice pack resting over his eye and Misha talking to the hospital in an attempt not to charges pressed that Jensen thought of it.
“I can’t believe you did that.” Misha admonished after convincing the staff to not press charges.
Jensen gave him a seething look, his eye already turning black and blue and the left side of his face beginning to swell. It hurt to even talk.
“We all do crazy things for love I suppose.” Misha laughed making Jensen glare at him once again. What was Jared going to think? Did he even dare tell Jared that Mike showed up at the hospital? Would it ruin his recovery? Better yet how did Mike even know Jared had gone into labor?
All these questions were running around in Jensen’s head on warp speed until he became dizzy. Misha’s chattering was helping him calm down some but his adrenaline was still pumping, especially knowing Mike was in another room getting treated as well.
Jensen’s head snapped up at hearing the doctor. He was standing with his arms crossed, a look of amusement on his face.
“Is Jared okay? What about the baby?” Jensen urged, dropping the soggy ice pack and managing to stand despite his head spinning.
“The baby is fine. We had a minor complication with Jared’s blood pressure dropping but baby and daddy are fine. She’s a healthy seven pounds five ounces. We have her in the nursery; Jared is still in recovery at the moment until he wakes up from anesthesia.”
Jensen felt himself breathe a little easier; his knees were becoming so weak until he felt himself being gently led into the chair both by Misha and the doctor.
“Your adrenaline rush is winding down and you’re becoming dizzy. Sit here and breathe for a while. A nurse will escort you to see your boyfriend in a minute and then you can see your daughter.”
Jensen nodded and began to breathe deeply through his nose and exhale out his mouth.
“Oh and that Mike character has been kicked out of the hospital and forbidden to see Jared. Don’t worry about him or the altercation.”
“Thanks doctor,” Misha muttered for him when Jensen couldn’t even utter a word.
“Let’s go see Jay yeah? Then you can see your baby girl?”
Jensen nodded again and breathed a few more times before letting Misha pull him up. The world shifted for a few minutes before he regained his balance.
As promised a nurse was waiting with a friendly smile to escort them to Jared’s room.
One Week Later:
“I’m sorry could you hold on for me?” Jensen cradled the phone between his head and his shoulder as he patted the baby’s bottom gently in an attempt to get her to stop crying.
The coffee house wasn’t busy but he didn’t want her to disturb the few customers he did have.
Slowly her screams dwindled down to whimpers until she snuffled against his shoulder sleepily.
Jensen began to breathe a bit easier until the phone slipped from his shoulder and clattered on the floor scaring her and eliciting more cries once again.
“Hey, what did I say about cursing?”
Jensen’s head whipped up to meet his boyfriend’s eyes sparkling with amusement. Jared was gingerly seated on a stool. Due to his surgery he was still sore and Jensen didn’t want to leave the responsibility of a newborn to his healing boyfriend. He still had to work; it was of course his business so as of now they had a makeshift nursery in the back room so she could stay with him and Jared during the day.
Jensen looked sheepish and let Jared take her from his hands making him sigh. “Thanks, sorry baby for waking you from your nap. I know you need your sleep.”
“I told you I’m fine Jensen.” Jared huffed but couldn’t hide his small smile as he stared down at his baby girl, her blue eyes sparkling in the dim light.
It felt like it was only yesterday that he was getting whisked away to the operating room.
Waking up to the sight of his boyfriend beaten to a pulp wasn’t welcoming but after Jensen explained himself and Misha was there to add his words of wisdom Jared calmed down, especially once he was able to see his baby girl. Her milky white skin against the patterned pink blanket making her look angelic.
“Are you going to stare at her all day or…?” Jensen grinned when Jared gave him a glare.
“Yes I am. Better than staring at your ugly mug, right Alana?” Jared cooed, staring down at his daughter as she blinked sleepily up at him.
“We’re one lucky set of parents, aren’t we?” Jensen whispered, settling behind Jared and breathing in his scent. Alana stared up at Jensen as he leaned over. Despite her being just a week old Jensen swore he could see recognition in her eyes every time he or Jared were near. And damn if that didn’t make his heart jump around and do cartwheels every time she looked at him, or reached for him in her shaky way, not really knowing what she was doing, or quieted down as he sang her a lullaby.
Alana, named after his late father Alan, was already molding into their lives seamlessly and Jensen didn’t know what he would do without her.
“Yeah,” Jared whispered while sliding his thumb over her chubby cheek. “We really are.”
Everything dwindled down to them, to this moment, to their daughter, to their love.
Jensen felt the box resting in his pocket and smiled at his daughter as she fell asleep in her daddy’s arm.
Once he asked, their lives would permanently become one and nothing could be better than this.