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Charity
06 October 2022 @ 05:58 pm
This journal is FRIENDS ONLY. What that means is a lot of my personal posts are flocked, however, almost all of my fandom posts are unlocked. I am not adding friends back at this time but feel free to friend me if you like. If you want to know anything else about me or this journal please visit my profile for more information.

Till then, Cherry (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧

Credit:Profile code is made by ddalgimonkeys the hunters only banner is made by temporalranger.
 
 
I'm feeling: sadsad
 
 
Charity
26 August 2016 @ 10:58 pm
I just went to my seminar for my second internship yesterday. It was an all day affair of course and boring. I had to drive an hour and 40 minutes in horrible traffic down the express way to get to St. Pete. I was in a minor accident, thankfully nothing worth stoping over I just got a tiny paint transfer on the bumper due to a jackass pulling in front of me when we are all going 70 on the express way!!!!, anywho this was also a poignant time for me because last time I attempted the internship I sort of fell apart from the inside.

I completed my first internship sucessfully. It was k-5 and I was in a second grade classroom and I loved the school, my kids and my cooperating teacher we got along great and had chemistry and I was stoked for my second one which is 6-12 so middle or high and ESE. I got a highschool ESE class and after maybe two weeks in it became a chore to go in. I didn't think the teacher I was paired with was a good teacher, I hated the paraprofessionals working in the classroom and I HATED my supervisor who was brand new to the program and didn't know what the hell to do wouldn't even attempt to come to seminars for us to talk to her because she lives far away! I live farther than she did to St. Pete.

Anyway, I would say this is when my anxiety really began win. I was constantly on a battle with my anxiety and trying to just STOP with everything but its an illness unfortunately and not normal jitters or being nervous its something I began to have all the time and it took me getting together with my boyfriend to admit that yes I do have a problem and this is absolutely not normal behavior to have. I used to dread for Wednesday to come around because then I would have to go back to that school and pretend that I wasn't dying inside and working with kids, whom I loved, but knew that my attempts didn't matter. It didn't help that my supervisor was always constantly on me, criticized me for everything and was basically against me working and going to school. I was told that it was an excuse and it shows that I am not commited to my schooling when I had to leave early one day to go into work. After that I sort of just gave up. I had a panic attack after a phone call to her where she told me these things and had a trip to the hospital because I wasn't calming down and my blood pressure was through the roof.

This was last Spring around March. I was halfway done with the internship too and I had 3 other classes I was attending and I had a moment of ephiphany where I decided that I can't keep doing this to myself. I had NEVER in my life ever dropped a class. I was always dead set focused on finishing school in the shortest amount of time. This fall I was supposed to be in my last internship than graduate but I took a step back and decided that I am not getting anything out of this experience but pain, it was causing me to reconsider my career choice and second guess my ability to do this.

Which, FUCK THAT. I'm sorry but NO person of higher statue that is a TEACHER no less should EVER make a student feel like that ever. I am not one to belittle people or call people names but she is a bitch and I will 100% stand by my word on that for what she did.

However, I have to thank her because without that I don't think I would have really begun to think of myself first. I dropped out of the class, finished my other ones and took a break until now where I am attempting to do it again this time with new everything and a better mindset going into it. I am a lot more confident in what I do and that I am going to do even better than my first one.

Sorry about this reflective post I was just thinking about how far I've come and wanted to really write it out. I promise I will do more fandom related posts for sure.

Let me ask you guys this though,

Should I do episode reviews for the new season of supernatural?

Yes
2(100.0%)
No
0(0.0%)
 
 
Charity
25 August 2016 @ 01:44 am
It's been a LONG time since I've made a new post huh? I can sit here and tell you that life has been busy yadda yadda yadda same old shit just another day.

I promised to update you all about me and my medical condition? issues? I don't know what to call the clusterfuck anymore! I figured what better time than at 1:30 in the morning, with a migraine and having to get up at 5:00 AM to drive 2 hours to a seminar for school! Rad!

Okay, well let's start that I went to see a neurosurgeon in Tampa for the cyst on my pineal gland. He was going to give me his opinion on what to do next. Basically I was told to wait and monitor it some more because the surgery is VERY involved and they don't want to do anything until I start presenting symptoms of hydrocephalus. Which I know UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH central. I don't want to wait until shit hits the fan I want to be proactive. I also wanted to see if the removal would lesson my migraines but I have to follow doctors orders which means more MRI's in my future. He wants me to visit a headache specialist so we'll see where that goes.

The good news is that I finally have recieved diability for my migraines in regards to school. I did that a few semesters back not even believing I could recieve disability services but migraines are a disability under the law SO I am taking what I can get. It is just for leniancy with absences I never know when I will have one and I don't want to be penalized for things that I can't control is the main thing.

I am still writing, I have already finished my spn_summergen story just waiting for it to be posted. Still reading a lot but I recently got back into wrestling (I used to watch it religiously for about 8 years straight and sort of got burnt out around 2010-2011 so I quit before joining the world of online so now everyone on my tumblr has to suffer as I post wrestling shit and I may make you all suffer too! It is definitely something else reading a threesome of hot, sweaty, muscular men gotta say WAAAAAAAAY different than J2 or SPN.)

And I don't know if Kim is cool with me announcing this but me and her MAY or MAY NOT be attending the convention in Jacksonville next year (don't forget I live in Florida broskis!)

And that's about it with me hopefully you all have been doing well and I miss everyone of you dearly. Don't be afraid to send me messages if you want to chat I am normally checking my stuff once daily. love ya!
 
 
I'm feeling: awakeawake
 
 
Charity
07 August 2016 @ 01:43 pm
Here to inform you all I have added two new stories for SPN and one in J2 at my PDF Library!
 
 
Charity
16 July 2016 @ 05:40 pm
Hey, so I don't know if I told anyone yet but as a project for class (which is for teaching students about writing). Basically we had to write a book ourselves and go through the writing process which entails editing, revising, brainstorming etc.

So basically I choose to write a persuassive about why you should watch supernatural. For anyone curious I'll post the book under the cut. It got rather personal for me talking about the friends and benefits from watching so that was difficult to get through.

So what I was asking if someone could possibly make a cover for my book? I have to read this in front of the class and want to sort of 'showcase' if you will the fanart and artists I talk about in the book.

If anyone is willing to or able I would appreciate it. Thank you :D
 
 
Charity
03 July 2016 @ 01:06 pm
I want to send out a sincere thank you for those who wished me a happy birthday a few days ago! It really meant a lot considering that birthday was sort of the worst ones I ever had for personal reasons. I've been dealing with bouts of depression that has really affected my relationship with my boyfriend as well as my family and my schooling. So it was really great to see some still cared, because sometimes it feels like no one really does but that made me quite happy <3

Other than dealing with that I just finished a book that I had to re-check out twice since I couldn't finish it the last time so that left me feeling very accomplished. I went to books a million yesterday and purchased two new books as well as an adult coloring book. I'm hoing to rekindle a love for more of my hobbies to attempt to help with the depression.

Other than that I have like 5 tabs open for stories to read from spn_j2_bigbang and spn_meanttobe! In other words I have A LOT of reading to do.

Recs will come if anyone is interested from my reading adventure.

Here's your first rec from my reading:

Sunday, Maybe Monday by alexisjane (Big Bang 2016)
Summary: Jensen is a short order cook. He works, he sleeps – it's enough. Then one day, Jensen notices Jared.

I normally don't do huge age difference in fics but I'm so glad I decided to try and read this! I just love the simplicity of the story it really breathes life into the crazy, plot driven fics that we normally get, and produces something that is more organize and really makes you feel the emotions and the relationship. 
 
 
Charity
19 June 2016 @ 06:51 pm
Hey all I participated in spn_summergen again and I am looking for a beta. It is gen and it is not complete yet but I am looking for someone to beta/give feedback. I only imagine the story should be about 3-4K. Anyone interested can reply here or simply message me at my email. Thanks!
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I'm feeling: anxiousanxious
 
 
Charity
16 June 2016 @ 12:05 am
Well, I don’t know if anyone remembers a little bit ago I made a post talking about the discovery of a cyst on my pineal gland. I was having MRI’s done to see if it was something I needed to remove. I just had my 6 month follow up MRI and it was noted it has grown more. I am almost at 2 centimeters and that is the cut off point for cysts because it will start causing symptoms related to the eye. The cyst is close to blocking a tube that allows fluids for the eye to flow. Pineal cysts are actually very common however large ones like I have are not as common and are often removed. My neurologist said I have a lot of extra room around in there which is likely why I haven’t developed symptoms yet but he referred me to a neurosurgeon for USF anyway because he is certain I am going to need it removed. The consultation is on the 18th of July and I (hopefully) expect the surgery will follow soon because I don’t want it to effect my school schedule. I imagine I’ll be in the hospital for a week and recovery should be about a month.

Thankfully they don’t do a craniotomy anymore. They remove a small portion of skull near the back of the neck and remove it by popping it, sucking out the pus and then removing the skin. The pineal gland is located in the middle of the brain near the back if anyone is curious. I am hoping this will lesson the migraines I have been having as I have been burdened with them since childhood. I have read a lot of stories from others who have had theirs removed as well and they said that it helped so that is really the number one reason I am ready for the surgery. I will update you all on any further progress.
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I'm feeling: awakeawake
 
 
Charity
01 June 2016 @ 10:00 am
Hey all, how has life been? Mine's seen better days but other than that I'm okay.

I am doing this project for a class about writing. I am writing a book and however ironic this is at the moment I still wanted to do it.

It is where I am writing about why you should watch supernatural.

This is where I need some assistance. I want some really good meta/commentaries about the show in general from fans. Since I have limited time to search for these (I know I can eventually find them) I figured I would send an APB for some really good meta about supernatural and why its a good show. I would want to include this in my book (mind you this is not a published book this is something I am fixing together. I don't plan to read these either but I wanted to include them in the book to look good)

So if you can link me to any (if its a self-rec thats fine too!) I would appreciate it.

Also since it is a persuassive book I wanted to open it with a random quote from spn that would get people interested, any suggestions?
 
 
I'm feeling: tiredtired
 
 
Charity
30 March 2016 @ 05:41 pm
Hey guys, this is the last chance to bid on me and many other talented people in the fandom to raise money for Crystal (nyxocity)! The auction ends on the 31st! I am still up for grabs here and a lot of other people are offering up some great things as well. So go on over and check it out!